Britney Spears's 55-Hour Husband Wishes He Hadn't Been a "Nice Guy"

Who: Grammy-winning pop icon Britney Spears, 37, and aspiring martial artist, Jason Alexander (not that Jason Alexander), 37.

How They Met: It’s unclear how exactly Britney and Jason met, but by all accounts it was when they were kids. Our bets are an on the playground meet-and-greet — where else do kids socialize, anyway?

More than a decade after becoming friends in their native Kentwood, Louisiana, Britney invited Jason to join her in Las Vegas to ring in the new year (2004). On the evening of Jan. 3, the childhood pals returned to Spears’s suite at the Palms (which she checked into under the name Alotta Warmheart, FYI), watched romantic flick The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, rented a lime green stretch limo, and made their way to one of the city’s many drop-of-the-hat wedding venues: A Little White Wedding Chapel. After a few hiccups, Britney and Jason wed around 5 a.m. The bride wore a crop top and trucker hat.

Why We Loved Them: Did we? Britney and Jason is the knock-off version of an already ultra-low-grade model: Britney and Kevin.

When They Peaked: Jan. 3, 2004 — their wedding night. Their downfall came 55-hours later, when the marriage was annulled.

The Breakup: Years post-Britney, Jason did what all great celebrity exes do, and shared his side of the story with a major broadcast network.

First, he created some additional damage by implying that he and Britney had been friends with benefits while she was dating Justin Timberlake (is Jason Alexander the reason J.T. wants Britney to cry him a river??). "There was an instance when [Britney and I] were hanging out," Alexander told ABC News. "He had called, and I was ... kicking it with her, kind of like the guy 'behind the scenes' no one knew about."

Alexander also revealed that he and Spears “had party favors” ahead of their spur of the moment nuptials, though he played coy concerning the nature of said “favors.” "Alcohol is a drug. Coffee is a drug. Cigarette is a drug. Yeah, we were doing drugs," he teased.

Despite the, uh, influences involved, Jason says he was “in love with [Britney]” at the time and thought she “felt the same way.”

Once Brit’s team caught wind of the marriage, they paid a visit to Sin City and worked to quickly annul the union.

The papers pin the decision on Spears, explaining that she “lacked understanding of her actions to the extent that she was incapable of agreeing to the marriage.”

Alexander says this reasoning is “bulls—t.” He signed out of deference to his bride, but hoped they’d get back together. He now regrets that decision, advising those in similar situations to not be a “nice guy.” “Don’t be a nice guy because nice guys finish last,” he said with conviction. “Make sure you’re thinking business.”

Months after dissolving their marriage, Britney told E! the whole situation was really just “silly.”

"It was me being silly, being rebellious, and not really taking the responsibility of what I was doing, you know?” she explained. “And after partying, you know, you really don't think about what you're doing. So it was one of those things that were really silly."

Where They Are Now:

Less than a year after the Vegas fiasco, Spears did another silly thing: she wed amateur rapper Kevin Federline (this time in an actual wedding gown). Two years and two sons (Sean, 13, Jayden, 12) later, the “Stronger” singer filed for divorce.

She’s been dating her personal trainer boyfriend Sam Asghari for over two years now.

Professionally, well … it’s Britney, bitch.

Alexander tried to cash in on his fleeting notoriety, but judging by the fact that his name is rarely mentioned without the parenthetical “not of Seinfeld fame,” we’d say he didn’t quite get there.

In 2015 he spent nearly four months in prison on domestic abuse charges.

Good call on that annulment, Brit.